Carrot Cake Cupcake!

I have a thing for food that comes in a small package. 

I guess it's just the cute factor. Mini pies, mini tarts (tartelettes sound even cuter), mini cakes, mini lasagnas...If I can make a baby version of something, I'd make it! That's not exactly why I made this dessert though, which is essentially carrot cake in cupcake form. Nope. I had a whole different reason.

In fact, I almost always have the same reason for cooking something: my mood. While other women show their change of mood through their choice of skirts or pants, mine translates to what gets served on the dinner table. I guess that's why my pantry is always well-stocked -- it has to be ready to serve two or three different moods at a time.

When I feel like retrieving to my comfort zone -- whether it's because I'm having exam pressure, or just feeling a little blue, or extremely exhausted -- I reach out for something comforting and warm, like mushroom risotto or chicken porridge. There is the occasional moment when only chocolate will do, in which case I'll turn to a cup of very rich and very dark hot chocolate.

When I feel upbeat, which often coincides with summery weather, I whip up something bright and sunny, like pasta with fresh vegetables. Bright colors and bold flavors will be on the menu, accompanied by a jug of chilled lemonade. 

When I feel excited, or on top of the world (things going well at the work front, perhaps), I strangely go for something spicy or, um, "ethnic". I will intuitively crave something Mexican, or Indonesian, or anything with a bit of a kick (or a lot). If you have an explanation for that, please give me a call! And when I'm, what's the word, going bananas over a guy? Well, that moment calls for a Hainanese chicken rice, complete with all the trimmings. If you're a guy (and not one of my guy friends!), and you find yourself struggling to finish a huge spread of Hainanese chicken rice at my dining table, be very suspicious that I have a huge crush on you. And if there's dessert, be very suspicious. If there's no dessert...I probably am just tired. I'm not that picky ;)

And when I'm having one of those moods -- spectacularly happy, permanent-grin-on-my-face kind of happy, the kind of mood that makes everything look pastel-colored.....The kind of mood that makes you understand La Vie en Rose ("Life in pink? that TOTALLY makes sense").....The kind of mood that makes every romantic comedy enjoyable no matter how much Hollywood has robbed it off its originality.....That calls for something cute, sweet, creamy and pretty. One way or the other it usually involves a guy. Vanilla, butter and sugar are usually in there somewhere. A guy, vanilla, butter and sugar...Can't go wrong with those.

Hence the Carrot Cake Cupcake today. That was my mood showing through.

Not just because I had extra carrots in my fridge.

Carrot Cake Cupcake

Makes 20 cupcakes

Adapted from www.jamieoliver.com

• 250g unsalted butter, softened
• 250g light brown soft sugar
• 5 large eggs, separated
• zest and juice of 1 orange
• 170g self-raising flour, sifted
• 1 slightly heaped teaspoon baking powder
• 100g ground almonds
• 100g chopped nuts (almonds/walnuts/cashews) plus a handful for sprinkling
• 1 heaped teaspoon ground cinnamon
• a pinch of ground cloves
• a pinch of ground nutmeg
• ½ teaspoon ground ginger
• 250g carrots, peeled and coarsely grated
sea salt

for the orange mascarpone icing:
• 100g mascarpone cheese
• 200g cream cheese
• 85g icing sugar, sifted
• zest of 1 large orange

Preheat the oven to 180ºC/350ºF/gas 4. Line the cupcake pan with cupcake wrappers. Beat the butter and sugar together by hand or in a food processor until pale and fluffy. Beat in the egg yolks one by one, and add the orange zest and juice. Stir in the sifted flour and baking powder, and add the ground almonds, nuts, spices and grated carrot and mix together well.

In a separate bowl, whisk the egg whites with a pinch of salt until stiff, then gently fold them into the cake mix. Scoop the mixture into the cupcake wrappers and bake for about 20-22 minutes until risen. You can check to see if the cupcakes are cooked by poking a cocktail stick into one. Remove it after 5 seconds and if it comes out clean the cake is cooked; if slightly sticky, it needs a bit longer, so put it back in the oven. Leave the cupcakes to cool completely on a wire rack.

Mix all the icing ingredients together and spread generously over the top of the cake. Finish off with a sprinkling of chopped walnuts.

Aubergine Parmigiana

Today I found out that shit happens.

I mean, I've always known that bad things happen...There's a whole spectrum of bad things that can happen to you, from things that ruin your day like a careless cyclist who hits your car and leaves a tiny dent, to things that can break your heart in the best and worst way that anything can break your heart. You know what I'm talking about. 

I've always known, just by the simple powers of observation, that best friends break up, people die of hunger, businesses go bankrupt and babies die for no reason at all. I know. But somehow I managed to make my way through life for 24 grand years without letting any of the bad things get the best of me. Oh sure, I wept, I got upset, I threw stuff. But I never let these things turn me into someone bitter, or scared, or timid. "Oh wow," you're thinking, "The optimism and arrogance of the youth."

Yeah, I guess. But it was also the naivety of the youth. I'd always been one of those naive children who embraced life for everything that it was. I saw challenges like everyone else, but I'd always thought, "Oh, it'll be fine." And even if it wouldn't be fine, I'd survive and be cheerful again after, like, 20 minutes. As someone once so perfectly described, I "propelled forward through life, hitting bricks and walls on my way, but always going forward nonetheless." Life was a big, bold adventure, and my mind selectively chose to remember the good memories over the bad. There was nothing zen about my upbeat outlook, it was just the pure fearlessness of a child trapped inside an adult's body.

And then life threw me one of those surprises, because that's just what life does. You know what I'm talking about. Total road kill. Heart leaping from a cliff into thin air, then crashing spectacularly into the ground. Heart pulp. Your belief system suddenly not being so believable anymore. Your comfort zone way, way far behind. One of those moments in life when no amount of motivational quotes or Ben and Jerry's or supportive friends can help you.

Shit happens.

And you find out that suddenly you're not so fearless anymore, not so charmingly naive, not so...innocent, perhaps. Suddenly you're a reluctant, scared, worried, and tired adult like everyone else. What's an adult to do? Well, it took a lot of long walks and absent moments spent staring at my laptop screen, but I think the answer is faith. When blind naivety doesn't save you anymore, faith can. Faith requires the patience and wisdom of an adult, which is probably why that was not the first resource I tapped into when I was faced with fears before. 

Faith to me means believing that things will be fine even if you don't know how or why or when. It's believing that there's a just government above who will protect you, love you and guide you when you ask it to...and when you listen. Faith means surrendering to the knowledge that there's no such thing as certainty or total control. It's knowing that shit happens all the time, but that you have it in you to guide yourself through the mess.

Do I feel a pang of sadness about growing up? Oh, sure. Instead of channeling Cinderella as a child (Girl sings with rats and birds, girl mops the floor, girl falls in love with a guy who can't remember what she looks like after dancing the whole night with her?....Come on), I could always relate better with Peter Pan and the Lost Boys. I never wanted to grow up! I wanted to live in a pastel-colored world. But perhaps I'm more like Wendy than Peter Pan -- I must return to the real world where the colors come in a far wider spectrum. But I'm pretty sure I still get to keep a little childishness in me.

And now...eggplants. Because loss of innocence and limp vegetables are TOTALLY correlated.

Aubergine Parmigiana

For 6 servings

Recipe adapted from www.jamieoliver.com

- 3 large firm aubergines
- olive oil
• 1 onion, peeled and finely chopped
• 1 clove garlic, if you can get it, peeled and finely sliced
• 1 heaped teaspoon dried oregano
• 2 x 400g tins good-quality plum tomatoes
• sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
• a large handful of fresh basil
• 4 large handfuls of freshly grated Parmesan cheese
• 2 handfuls of dried breadcrumbs
• a little fresh oregano, leaves chopped

optional:
• 1 x 150g ball of buffalo mozzarella

Remove the stalks from the aubergines and slice them up into 1cm thick slices. Get a dry pan really hot. 

Put 2 or 3 glugs of olive oil into another pan on a medium heat. Add the onion, garlic and dried oregano and cook for 10 minutes, until the onion is soft and the garlic has a tiny bit of colour. If you’re using tinned tomatoes, break them up and give the mixture a good stir, then put a lid on the pan and simmer slowly for 15 minutes.

Meanwhile, grill the aubergines on both sides until lightly charred – you may have to do them in batches. As each batch is finished, remove them to a tray and carry on grilling the rest until they’re all nicely done. When the tomato sauce is reduced and sweet, season it carefully with salt and pepper, and add the basil. You can leave the sauce chunky or you can purée it.

Get yourself an earthenware type dish. Put in a small layer of tomato sauce, then a thin scattering of Parmesan, followed by a single layer of aubergines. Repeat these layers until you’ve used all the ingredients up, finishing with a little sauce and another good sprinkling of Parmesan. I like to toss the breadcrumbs in olive oil with a little freshly chopped oregano and sprinkle them on top of the Parmesan. Sometimes the dish is served with torn-up mozzarella on top, which is nice too.

Place the dish in the oven and bake at 190°C/375°F/gas 5 for half an hour until golden, crisp and bubbly. It’s best eaten straight away, but it can also be served cold.

A Summer Meal - Linguini with Garlic, Chili, Prawns and Coriander

Summer has me wanting a glass of iced mint lemonade all the time.

It's the only thing that will get me through a hot, sweaty day. Something tangy, minty, citrusy bright and cold...Oh yeahh. I plan my meals based on this drink -- anything that goes with it is in, and the rest gets stocked in the freezer! And what goes with tangy, minty, citrusy bright and cold lemonade?

Something garlicky...No heavy sauces, just beautiful, jade green olive oil.

And some freshly chopped chilies.

And some fragrant coriander leaves to spruce things up.

I don't get what people mean when they say that coriander leaves smell grassy. What's grassy? Do you know?

I think I'm gonna bung in some prawns to create a more substantial meal. But still totally elegant.

And I think all of that will go with some pasta. Pasta and minty lemonade, and fabulous weather. Ahhhh.

Linguini with Garlic, Chili, Prawns and Coriander

For 1 person

Enough pasta for a generous serving, preferrably spaghetti, linguini or fettucini

3 fat garlic cloves, sliced thinly

1 chili with seeds, sliced thinly

A handful of prawns, shelled

A handful of young coriander leaves

Olive oil

Chicken stock cube, salt and pepper

Some extra coriander leaves for scattering on top

Boil a big pot of water. Only when it comes to the boil, add some salt and add the pasta.

In the mean time, heat up some olive oil on a pan over low heat. Saute the garlic and chili. Once they become fragrant, add the prawns and crumble in the stock cube.

Once the pasta is al dente, drain well and add the pasta to the pan. Add the coriander leaves and stir everything well until the leaves wilt slightly. Season with salt and pepper. 

Serve it on a big pasta plate and scatter the remaining coriander leaves on top.

The Road to Peace of Mind is Paved with Imperfections

"There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin

Here’s a fact. Everyone is trying to make sense of their life in some way. We’re trying to make it feel right to us. Some do it by pursuing their goals, some with art, some with love, and some by giving to others. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been trying to make sense of my life by trying to be perfect. Well, up until some time ago, to be exact. But it was a profound force in my life. It took over the big picture and it showed in the small things. If I was perfect, I was fine, and if I wasn’t perfect, I was a failure. Yes, I was a blossoming, self-declared perfectionist.

If you have just an ounce of perfectionism in you, you’d understand when I say that there’s a whole spectrum of perfectionism. There’s one end of the spectrum, where the level of perfectionism is rather healthy, and all you desire is to reach your most ambitious goals. Then there’s the other end of the spectrum, where perfectionism has hindered you from functioning well as an individual. You won’t go out of the house because things are not controllable outside of the safety of your home. You can’t have a relationship because human beings do unpredictable things that make you feel uncomfortable. And the rest of us fit somewhere in between these two extremes.

I have traveled the spectrum a fair bit in my life. There was a time in my childhood when I would be frustrated and unable to sleep if I would get an 8.9 in a class test, while others could get a 9.  There was a time when I had to write an essay for a literature competition, but I couldn’t write it simply because my handwriting was not perfect enough for me. It was not perfect enough because some letters were slightly larger than the others, and my b’s and d’s were not of the same height. Perfect handwriting, to my 12-year-old self, meant that the letters had to have the exact same size and height. I’d write a few words, be frustrated because they were not “perfect”, crumple the paper into a ball, throw it on the floor, and start over only to fail to make the perfect handwriting again. It became so bad that my mother had to draw lines between the actual lines on the paper with a pencil, so that I could make all my letters the same height. My young mind could not recognize that this was the beginning of my love affair with perfectionism. I simply thought I was a failure, because I believed that successful people could write with perfect handwriting.

I continued to have a complicated relationship with my perfectionism. There were days when I’d criticize myself so many times in my head, sometimes literally hundreds of times per day. My hair was not right. I was not pretty enough. Not articulate enough. Could have worked harder on my assignment. Could have been nicer to people. Could have been more focused in my prayers. The way I walked was not right. Perfect people walk gracefully and in one straight line. I did not.  The things on my desk had to be arranged all facing north, with equal spacing between each other. Why did I say that stupid thing? Why couldn’t I be more patient with my baby sister? Why do I binge? I created highly unreasonable definitions of perfect, definitions I couldn’t fit into. In my eyes, I was far from perfect. And yet, I decided that being perfect was the only way I could be happy, the only way to live. The only respectable way to live.

And yet, in all aspects, I appeared as a normal teenager. I excelled in several things and was generally happy. I had friends and the typical ups and downs of a teenager. And yet, even in my happiest moments, there was always something that didn’t feel right. There was always something in the back of my head, telling me that I’m not perfect and thus undeserving of true happiness. As destructive as it was, I held on to my perfectionism. I was even proud of it for some time. I felt like perfectionists were the type of people who were ambitious, hard-working and unafraid to pursue their goals. We were the people who would succeed. And true, if you could control your perfectionism and use it to your advantage, it could motivate you to reach your goals. But I find that it’s immensely difficult to make sure that your perfectionism is large enough to motivate you, but not too large that it eats you. Finding balance, as those among us who are honest with themselves know, is one of the finer challenges in life. After years of being a proud yet tormented perfectionist, I finally realized that I had to deal with it, or it would sabotage my life.

And even then, it was not easy to unlearn my perfectionism. Oh boy, was it difficult. And even if you’re not a perfectionist, I believe you can relate to this experience. If we’re honest, each of us is struggling with something, a part of us that prevents us from being truly happy, and would continue to do so until we deal with it. It can be pessimism, laziness, procrastination, shyness, lack of confidence, lack of purpose, you name it. But here’s the thing. No matter how many times I failed to properly deal with my perfectionism, I never gave up on myself. I never let my perfectionism define who I am. Never once did I say, “This is just who I am and I can’t change it, so I should stop trying.” And I think that’s the first step of dealing with your issue: never let it define you. It’s not who you are, it’s just one side of your personality that you would like to change, to allow yourself to be truly happy.

And here’s where I think people are divided. There are people who argue that you can’t change the fundamentals of who you are, and there are people who argue that you can, and that in fact, you need to do so throughout your life in order to grow. I lean towards the second. If you’re a follower of the first school of thought, don’t sneer just yet. I think people probably can’t completely change their natural tendencies, but they can develop skills on how to deal with them. I still have perfectionism tendencies – I still demand a lot from myself, and sometimes I criticize myself too much. But I have learned how to respond to these tendencies. I have learned how to deal with them so that they don’t take control over my life. Whenever I feel my perfectionism urges coming up, I tell myself, “Perfectionist is bad, dedicated and motivated is good.” This motto reminds me that as long as I stay dedicated to what I’m doing and motivated, I’ve done my best, and that’s all I need to be. And not just that – it also reminds me that it’s okay to have perfectionism tendencies. It doesn’t mean I’m a perfectionist. What matters is how you respond to these tendencies. Do you succumb? Or do you keep a clear head and choose to do what’s best for you?

In my opinion, the argument that people can’t change is nonsense. Have you met a person who has never gone through a major personality change in their life? If you look back at your life, could you say that you haven’t changed at all, personality-wise? I find that people need to constantly change to survive. As we get older, our challenges become more difficult, and we need to grow in order to rise to these new challenges. And isn’t change the essence of growth? Growing up means you become something that was initially not you. I was a spoiled child, but because I was sent abroad to study at the age of 13, I had to be independent and take care of myself. Slowly I grew into a more independent person. Is that not change? And yet, if I decided that being independent was impossible for me, I believe I would not have become independent. What you believe becomes your self-fulfilling prophecy. It becomes your reality. So if you believe that you can’t change, you’re probably right. If you believe you can, you’re probably right too.

So that was the first lesson I learned the hard way: Never let your demons define you. Learn the skills to deal with them, and never give up. And if you forget why you bother to deal with your demons (we all forget from time to time), remember that it’s because you owe it to yourself to be truly happy. We all deserve to have peace of mind and happiness.

The second thing that I found helpful was to take it day by day. I once went to a Christian school, and although I’m not Christian, I still had to attend mass every Monday. I had to sit with the other students, listen to their singing and to the sermon. One of the regular songs was about taking your burden off your shoulders and putting it before God. That concept appealed to me tremendously. Dealing with your demons is difficult, but it gets easier if you break it down into days. Just like a tired athlete who needs rest, you too need time-off from all your worries. After a long day of fighting off my perfectionism tendencies, nothing feels better than to take a moment alone, close my eyes and say, “God, I tried hard today. And yet my problem is still there. Tonight I will take my problem off my back and lie it down in front of You. Please soothe my frustrations and let me have my rest. Tomorrow I will try again.” Doing that always makes me feel energized and calm.

But I found that self-conviction and persistence wasn’t enough – they had to be paired with self-understanding. If ever there is one powerful tool that can open many doors for you, I think self-understanding is it. Personally, I think self-understanding is being honest with yourself and learning about how you work. Why do I have perfectionism tendencies? I read that perfectionism is a tool we use to defend ourselves against inner vulnerabilities. Oh, how that resonates with me. That feels so true. What do I feel vulnerable about? What are my fears, my insecurities? What am I trying to achieve by trying to be perfect? Who am I trying to please? Does it really make me happy?

Going down that road can be uncomfortable and takes courage. Some truths about ourselves are just not pretty. We may find things we don’t like about ourselves. It’s tempting to not go into them and bury them instead. Oh yes, it will be tempting to follow your tendencies too, because they just feel so natural. When this happens, I find it helpful to remember why I’m doing all this: the pursuit of happiness. Peace of mind is not just some distant concept reserved for the most zen among us and Buddhist monks – it’s a necessity if we long for a happy life. And I don’t mean the kind of happiness that we derive from a great relationship, an achievement or an easy day spent hanging out with best friends. I mean the kind of happiness we have even when our love life or achievements are non-existent. I mean the kind of happiness we derive from strength and stability of mind, and from understanding and accepting ourselves. If anything helped me to deal with my perfectionism, I think learning about myself with genuine honesty was it. I read psychological explanations for the way I worked. I spent time pondering about why I work the way I work. It makes a world of difference when you’re honest with yourself. You see, people are highly skilled at fooling themselves. We believe what we want to believe. If we are prepared to look at ourselves just as we are, with full acceptance, we may find that suddenly things become clear to us.

They certainly became clear to me. Slowly, because sometimes things are revealed to us in pieces, little by little. There should be no surprise in that – I bet a lot of our parents are still dealing with their demons. There’s no quick-fix solution to this. It became clear to me that I wanted to be perfect because that’s where I derived my self-worth from. Growing up, the people around me have always been ambitious and successful. I was always encouraged to aim high, and praised when I did well. People have always expected me to do well. Everyone longs for acceptance, and I am no different. Performing and living up to other people’s expectations was my yardstick for success. Success equaled self-worth. All along, I was looking for the feeling of being worthy.

Unfortunately, self-understanding alone doesn't lead you to peace of mind. There's still the last piece of the puzzle, the trickiest one, which is self-acceptance. Why is it tricky? I think constructive self-acceptance, which is self-acceptance that will lead you to happiness, requires you to find a balance between loving who you are and not letting your demons define you. You should accept yourself, but you shouldn't hastily accept those characteristics that make you less than happy as a fixed part of you. And here's another point where people are divided. Some people would argue that you should accept everything about who you are, the good and the bad. And I agree, I think you should. But not those characteristics that make you less than happy. You, not other people. The purpose of accepting yourself is to be happy. Why should you accept those characteristics that actually do not make you happy?

Also, who is to say that these characteristics are you; an unalterable part of you? Remember my paragraph about change before. We should be careful in labeling ourselves, because labeling is a very powerful tool. We tend to believe the labels we give ourselves, and they will, eventually, become our reality. If we label ourselves as lacking in confidence, and we accept that, we will never be confident. Lack of confidence can cause many problems in life -- it may stop us from pursuing our dreams, prevent us from having meaningful relationships with others, and lead us to pessimism. Why should we allow ourselves to be this way?

Let me elaborate by using myself as an example. To constructively accept myself, I accept that I have perfectionism tendencies, but I refuse to let them take over my life. I refuse to call myself a perfectionist, because I don't need to stay as one. I can learn skills to deal with my perfectionism tendencies. I take the same approach to other characteristics that make myself unhappy. As for those characteristics that are not necessarily positive but that don't make me unhappy, I accept them fully. I accept that I can be careless, that I have no sense of direction, that I can be too open, that I can withdraw myself from others in certain situations. I don't fret over my hair on a bad hair day.

The paradox is this: Once I accepted myself, it became easier to deal with my perfectionism. I came to the understanding that that self-worth is not derived from success or pleasing others. Everyone goes through failures. Does it diminish your self-worth when you fail? No. I believe you derive your self-worth from living well and being yourself. If you do your best, practice kindness, pursue your purpose in life, allow room for mistake for yourself and others, and be yourself, I believe you can derive self-worth from that.

So I began to try to extract self-worth from these things. I took baby steps towards my lifelong goals. As part of living well, I began exploring the spiritual side of my life. I prayed more. I confided in God more. I laughed off my mistakes. I gave myself credit for the things I achieved. I made time to do things I really loved, like cooking, reading cookbooks and spending time with friends. I tried to be kind when I didn't feel like it. I didn't always succeed, but no worthy pursuit is supposed to be easy. Every night, I still take my worries off my shoulders, put them away, and get my mental rest.  

Unexpectedly, my perfectionism tendencies also become less and less. It's like seeing the world through a new pair of glasses. Suddenly, I understand that life is meant to be imperfect. Life is a mess. Life is a succession of messy, unpredictable affairs. Accepting this gives me immense relief. I am no longer a victim of my own perfectionism. It no longer prohibits me from being happy, from loving myself, from embracing life's unpredictable events. But I am also under no illusion that peace of mind is a static concept. I don't believe that once you reach peace of mind, you will always have it. You need to maintain in by practicing the things that led you to peace of mind in the first place. It may be a lifelong journey, but I feel that this is a start.

Spicy Prawn Curry (Gulai Udang)

This is one of those sinfully delicious dishes. Not because of the prawns -- contrary to common belief, prawns  contain more good fat than bad fat, and are good for your health. No, this dish is sinful because of the coconut milk, which is the base of the sauce. It's cooked for a long time until it has a very thick consistency, studded with spices and very rich in flavor. Part of the coconut milk will be turned into coconut oil, which will be red in color from the chilies. Although you won't think it, this red oil is actually very flavorful -- just a bowl of hot steamed rice slicked with this oil and the curry sauce is heavenly, but you can take it up a notch by using it to make fried rice!

I grew up visiting my maternal grandparents every other weekend. My grandma would cook up a storm in her tiny kitchen every time we would come over. She had several special dishes up her sleeve that she made over and over, and this dish is one of them. Her version also contains stinky beans and hard-boiled quail's eggs, which really take the dish over the top. Mine is the simpler, student-kitchen-in-the-Netherlands version. 

I often wonder what life would be like had my grandma not passed away when I was young. I loved having a grandma, and she was everything a grandma was supposed to be. She was sweet, loving and tender. She completely adored me and was never mad at me. She was such a lady -- her gray hair was always neatly pulled up into a bun, she had the best smell, and she always wore such pretty colours. She tended to her rose garden so carefully, only to have her roses plucked and chopped up by me when they bloomed. I remember looking up at her from my toy kitchenette, her roses completely butchered up on my toy kitchen counter, me grinning the naive grin of a child who didn't understand the time and labor that went into those delicate flowers. "These are the chilies," I said, pointing at the rose petals. She'd grin back at me. 

She'd then feed me the fried chicken that she made especially for me, the best one in the world. She'd tell my mother not to get angry at me for ruining the roses again. She'd bring me in for a nap when the heat and the humidity had gotten the best of me. She'd fan me with a magazine when the rackety air-conditioning would be making too much noise again and disturbing my sleep. Sunday afternoons at grammy's were the one of the highlights of my childhood.

Even to this day, one of the most vivid memories I have of my childhood is of my grandma, sitting on her small kitchen stool, chopping up vegetables and grinding spices, her back turned towards me. Although I never had the chance to learn about cooking from her, I feel like when I make this dish, I may be continuing her cooking legacy. Who knows, maybe it even tastes quite similar to hers.

Spicy Prawn Curry (Gulai Udang)
For 4 people

4 large handfuls prawns, cleaned (it's up to you to keep the shells intact or not)
5 kaffir lime leaves
juice of 1/2 lime
1 lemongrass, stalk bruised, or 1 tsp powdered lemongrass
chicken/vegetable stock cube
salt and sugar to taste
500 ml coconut milk

To be made into a spice paste:
7 shallots
5 garlic cloves
10 chilies
1 tbsp coriander seeds

With a blender, a food processor or a pestle and mortar, make a smooth spice paste using the spice paste ingredients. Add oil or water to make it easier to blitz everything into a smooth paste.

On a hot wok, heat up some oil (less if you've added some to the blender) and sautee the spice paste with the lime leaves until everything is fragrant and cooked.

Add the lime juice, lemongrass, coconut milk, stock cube and sugar. Once it comes to the boil, lower the heat and add the prawns. The reason why we're not adding salt at this point is that the sauce will be cooked until it's reduced, and once it's reduced, you may find that the stock cube was enough to salt the curry.

Keep cooking on a low heat until the sauce is reduced to a very thick consistency. The curry is done when red oil starts to surface. Taste and add salt if needed.

Serve with hot steamed rice.

Crispy Fried Fish with Spicy Yellow Sauce (Ikan Pesmol)

One of the most perfect Indonesian lunches, in my opinion, consists of this dish, served with stir-fried snake beans, bean sprouts and tempe, and a plate of hot steamed rice. This is Indonesian home cooking, and definitely something that my grandmother, mother and aunts have been cooking and eating their whole lives. It is light and delicious with many different textures and colors. I get very greedy when I see this being served on the table!

I use dorado fish in this dish (called mahi-mahi in Indonesian), but you can use any mild-tasting fish like pomfret, gourami or sea bass. I prefer smaller fish that can be fried until very crispy, although some people prefer thick, meaty fish fillets. It's really up to you. The sauce is mouthful and savoury, slightly spicy from the chilies, fragrant with lime leaves and slightly sweetened by the tender spring onion. The candlenuts make the sauce taste very rich without making it heavy, which means it doesn't mask the taste of the fish. Perfect for a seafood lunch.

The accompanying vegetable dish, stir-fried snake beans, bean sprouts and tempe is one of the easiest vegetarian stir-fries there is. It takes hardly any time to cook, and perfect to be eaten on its own because the tempe provides protein and a meaty bite. Because it tastes very mild, it's a suitable pairing for bolder-tasting dishes. 

Crispy Fried Fish with Spicy Yellow Sauce (Ikan Pesmol)

For 6 people

6 whole fish/fish fillets (dorado, pomfret, gourami, sea bass), 1 per person

Juice of 2 limes

3 tsp powdered turmeric

3 lime leaves

5 or more chilies (a mix of red, orange and green), cut into diagonal slices

2 spring onion, cut into 3-cm chunks

2 medium tomatoes, cut into wedges

200 ml water

Salt and sugar to taste

To be made into a smooth paste:

9 shallots

5 garlic cloves

3 tsp powdered turmeric

2 cm ginger or 2 tsp powdered ginger

2 cm galangal or laos

1 lemongrass, the thick white part only

9 candlenuts

If using whole fish, make sure the fish is scaled, gutted and thoroughly cleaned. Cut deep diagonal slices on the flesh of the fish, and mix the fish with the lime juice (save 2 tablespoon for later use), turmeric powder and some salt. Leave to marinate in the fridge for about 20 minutes.

Using a blender or a pestle and mortar, make a smooth paste of the spice paste ingredients. Saute the paste on a hot wok with some oil. Once fragrant, add the lime leaves, chilies, the remaining 2 tablespoon lime juice and water. Add salt and sugar to taste.

Once it comes to the boil, lower the heat and add the tomatoes and spring onion. The low heat will ensure that the tomato juice comes out and flavors the sauce. Simmer for 5-10 more minutes.

Meanwhile, deep-fry the fish until golden brown and very crispy. Drain on kitchen paper. To serve, pour the sauce over the fish and serve immediately.

Stir-Fried Snake Beans, Bean Sprouts and Tempe

For 6 people

3 large handfuls snake beans, cut into 3-cm chunks

4 large handfuls bean sprouts

2 large handfuls tempe, cut into 3-cm sticks 

5 garlic cloves, sliced thinly

3 shallots, sliced thinly

4 chilies, cut into diagonal slices

2 spring onion, cut into 3-cm chunks

1 chicken/vegetable stock cube

Salt, sugar and white pepper to taste

1 cup water

On a wok over high heat, heat up a few tablespoons of oil and sautee the garlic, shallots and chilies until fragrant. Add the snake beans and tempe. Season with the stock cube, salt, sugar and pepper. Add the water and turn the heat down to medium.

Once the snake beans and tempe are half cooked, add the bean sprouts and spring onion. Stir-fried until everything is cooked through but still crunchy. Do not overcook to retain the beautiful vibrant colours. 

Serve immediately.

Indonesian Mild Curry (Opor)

Opor, one of the most beloved curries in Indonesia, is very versatile. The original version calls for chicken, but it works very well with other mild-tasting protein like tempe (soy bean cake), tofu and hard-boiled eggs. It's also wonderful with vegetables -- snake beans and mushrooms are my favorite. I actually like the vegetarian version of opor better. The tofu soaks up the rich sauce very well, as does the tempe, and since this is a milder type of curry, it doesn't mask the subtle taste of the vegetables. And if you've never had  a curry with boiled eggs before, don't turn up your nose -- just keep reading and you'll see why!

Although this is one of our milder curries, it's bursting with flavors. The coconut milk sauce is enriched with an array of spices, and the palm sugar adds an almost coconut-y sweetness to the curry, which balances out the savoury note provided by the chicken broth. It's best eaten with a lot of rice to mop up the sauce!

Start with an obscene amount of spices...And chop up all your ingredients.

Blitz the spices using a blender, and dump on a hot wok with some oil.

After the spice paste becomes slightly yellow and very aromatic, add the coconut milk and the rest of the ingredients, except for the mushrooms.

The tofu is fried before hand, so that it's soft on the inside and crispy on the outside. The hard-boiled eggs are fried briefly until they develop a thin, crackly skin that's very scrumptious. There's something about the creamy egg yolk, the satiny smooth egg white and the crispy skin that pairs very well with the curry.

This recipe also uses snake beans, tempe and enoki mushrooms. These mushrooms retain a good bite even after cooking, which works very well with the sauce. 

Cook the curry on medium heat. Don't worry if the curry looks very pale at this stage, because the color will get darker later.

Let all the flavors marry...

Once the curry comes to a boil, add the mushrooms, and turn down the heat so that the curry is just simmering. Your curry is done after it's been simmering for about 10 minutes and it has no more hint of bitterness. This means that all the spices have been cooked thoroughly.

Indonesian Mild Curry (Opor)

For 8 people

1 block of tempe (soy bean cake), cut into thick strips

2 large blocks of tofu, cut into thick triangles

1 large bunch of snake beans, cut into 4 cm pieces

2 bunches of enoki mushrooms, bottom part chopped off and cut into chunks

8 hard-boiled eggs, skin peeled

1000 cc coconut milk, mixed with 250 cc water

Spice paste:

18 garlic cloves (I'm not kidding with my blog title)

15 shallots

12 candlenuts

3 tbsp coriander seeds

5 heaping tbsp palm sugar, shaved

1 tsp ground ginger

1/2 tsp ground cumin

1 lemongrass stalk, bruised

2 bay leaves

2-3 chicken/vegetable stock cube

white pepper, sugar and salt to taste

Deep-fry the tofu and boiled eggs until they form a thin skin. Drain on kitchen paper.

Grind all the spices for your spice paste using a blender or a food processor until smooth. Add some oil to the blender if it's difficult to blitz everything into a smooth paste.

Heat some oil in a large wok. Add the spice paste and sautee on medium heat until aromatic and the paste turns yellow.

Add the coconut milk that has been thinned with water to the wok. Add your eggs, tofu, tempe, snake beans, ground ginger, ground cumin, lemongrass stalk, bay leaves and stock cube as well. Stir well.

Bring everything to the boil, and then lower the heat until the curry is just simmering. Season with salt, sugar and pepper to your liking. Add the mushrooms and simmer for ten more minutes until the curry sauce doesn't have any hint of bitterness.

Serve with steamed rice.

Avocado and Coconut Ice Cream

Do you have any siblings?

Do they remember your birthday every year, and get you a nice present, and a sweet card with a thoughtful birthday message for you?

Do they break their piggy bank and get you an adorable yellow tea set as a housewarming gift because you just moved into a new house all by yourself?

Do they remind you about your mum's or you dad's birthday, because they know you suck at remembering birthdays?

Do they not get angry when you forget their birthday and not get them a present? Do they share their presents with you instead?

Do they make you cupcakes and cookies?

Do they throw you a "Welcome Home" party where they dress up all their dolls, get party hats and balloons because you're coming home for a holiday?

Do they think you're the coolest person in the world ever? Do they introduce you to their little friends precisely because they think you're the coolest there is?

Do they brag about you to their friends?

Do they want to be the first to congratulate you on your birthday, so very badly, that they congratulate you a day early?

Do they say they miss you when you call? Do they ask if you miss them?

Do they worry that you're still single?

Do they tell you as it is, and share their thoughts with you?

If they don't...that's okay, siblings aren't always great that way. But very fortunately for me, mine is. My sister Mezzaya is fantastic. My sister Mezzaya is fantastic because she does all these things. I thought of her when I made this ice cream -- we both love ice cream, and this ice cream is inspired by the drink that we used to order at a small restaurant near our house. I still remember the humid afternoons that we spent there, slurping a bowl of steaming broth and noodles and washing it down with a big glass of sweet avocado "juice".

I think she'll love this ice cream.

It's incredibly quick and easy to put together -- you'll take no more than 20 minutes to assemble it, and then you just have to pop it into the freezer. It does take 3 hours to set, but you don't have to do much during this time period. You only need to take it out of the freezer every 30 minutes and whisk it briefly to make sure that it stays smooth and creamy, instead of grainy and icy. You can then enjoy a scoop of fragrant and utterly delicious ice cream for as long as it keeps in your freezer. Not a lot of work for a wonderful result! 

Avocado and coconut are my favorites -- I love how creamy, rich and exotic they are. I love how they impart a subtle taste and fragrance to a dish, and how they can make a dish feel luxurious. Combined together, they create a voluptuous and exceptionally creamy ice cream. I also use the classic and well-loved combination of avocado and condensed milk here. In Indonesia, these two go together like salt and pepper. Avocado and condensed milk smoothie is available in most restaurants -- thick, smooth pureed avocado whipped with vanilla or chocolate condensed milk. Just imagining this drink in ice cream form makes me swoon! If you're an avocado lover, this is as good as it gets (Well, this and a bowl of kick-ass, freshly made guacamole!).

Please don't be afraid of making ice cream without an ice cream maker. People have been doing this for ages, and you can too! All you need are a blender or food processor, and a whisk, a spatula or a handheld mixer. If you follow my tips closely, you should end up with a beautiful pale jade and luscious ice cream.

Avocado and Coconut Ice Cream
Makes about 12 scoops

2 large or 3 medium ripe avocados
1 1/2 tbsp lemon juice
1/4 cup or 50 gr granulated sugar
3/4 can condensed milk
1 can or 375 ml thick coconut milk, chilled in the fridge

Do not skimp on the sugar or coconut milk -- sugar and fat help prevent the ice cream from being icy and grainy. Sugar and fat do not freeze or crystallize, and so adding the right amount to your ice cream is essential for the desired result. You can reduce the amount of sugar and condensed milk if you want to watch your sugar intake, but your ice cream won't be as creamy. My advice would be to follow the recipe and limit your consumption of the ice cream instead. A small scoop of the real deal is often better and more enjoyable than a lot of the fake stuff!

Scoop out the flesh of the avocado and place in the blender or food processor. Add the lemon juice and sugar; blitz until smooth.

Shake well the can of coconut milk, pour the content into the blender. Pour in the condensed milk as well. Blitz again until everything is mixed together. Don't worry if the ice cream seems too sweet at this stage, or if the coconut seems to overpower the avocado. By the time the ice cream is set, the sweetness and the coconut taste will be reduced , and the dominant taste will be the avocado.

Pour into a plastic or metal container and place in the freezer. Make sure your freezer is not overcrowded, or your ice cream will take longer to set. After 30 minutes, take the container out of the freezer and mix the ice cream with a whisk, a spatula or a handheld mixer thoroughly. Using a spatula, scrape down the sides of the container -- ice crystals are likely to form on the sides and you want to whisk these too to prevent an icy ice cream. Place the container back in the freezer.

Do this every 30 minutes for the next 2-4 hours, or until the ice cream is set. Scoop out and serve.

Prawns and Broccoli in Oyster Sauce

I just love seafood.

I grew up enjoying countless seafood dishes made by my mother, who is a superb cook. We had a weekend ritual -- every Sunday, we'd wake up early, go to the traditional market near my house, and buy a few days' worth of groceries. Grocery shopping with mum was always great fun, because she shopped generously, would always buy the most exotic fruits for dessert, and let you get anything you want. "It is, after all, the weekend," she'd say approvingly with a wink.

It was a marvelous traditional market with rows and rows of fresh produce, colorful traditional cakes and snack vendors with their fried goodies piled high, which were my absolute favorite. Those were the innocent days when I didn't worry about food coloring or fat content. With its narrow alleyways, muddy streets, stinky corners and sweaty shoppers, the market was not for everyone, but to my 10-year-old eyes, it was a magnificent and vibrant place full of all sorts of delicious things to cook. I think my love for cooking began there.

My job was to carry the shopping bags. We would start at the greengrocer's, where my mum would buy kilos of water spinach and cabbage and tomatoes and aubergines and stinky beans. Then we would move on to our butcher's, where huge chunks of meat hang on hooks from the ceiling, hovering slightly over our heads. The smell of the fresh meat would be so overpowering, and I'd always be stuck in between fat mothers who were competing to get the best part of the cow. I'd leave my mum, who'd be bargaining with the butcher, to order our chicken from the chicken lady. She had one of those huge ginzu knives that would make a convincing thud as it whammed at the chicken, cutting it into 8 pieces. And then we would get to the seafood vendor.

Ahh. That was the best part. Fish and fish and even more fish and prawns and squid and octopus and lobsters and tuna fillets and tiny shrimps and mussels and clams, all fresh off the boat and gleaming at me. My mother, who was wise enough to start educating me about food and cooking early in my life, would tell me to pick the freshest fish for her. At first I was disgusted at the idea of touching fish and checking the color of their gills and poking at the flesh to test the bounciness, but thankfully she made me do it anyway. Amazingly, when fish is really fresh, it doesn't smell fishy, it just smells fresh and briny like the sea! It became a personal joy to get my hand wet picking the best victims for our dinner. When I came to the Netherlands, I was surprised to find out how many people (also older ones) who don't know how to pick fresh fish. Their fish comes gutted and filleted in a styrofoam packaging in a supermarket. I think that can't compare to shopping for fish at a fish vendor.

Whatever sea bounty that we would bring home, my mum would always turn it into something delicious and special. Fried fish simply spiced with salt and turmeric, little fishes fried until crisp and tossed in a fiery chili sauce, prawns tossed in butter and honey, thick cod fillets cooked in a yellow curry with orange and green chili peppers, grilled squid drizzled with a sweet soy sauce...It helped me to embrace all sorts of food, and to instinctively look for variety in the ingredients that I use, now that I cook for myself.

This simple prawn and broccoli dish reminds me of home -- it's simply cooked, fresh and good for you. A lot of people are afraid of eating too much prawn because of its cholesterol content, but it's actually recently proven to be untrue. Prawns are an excellent source of protein and are lower in calories than meat, and actually help you to increase the level of healthy fat in your body, the kind that is good for you. Just google it!

Prawn and Broccoli in Oyster Sauce

For 2 people

1 tbsp Shaohsing rice wine/Chinese cooking wine/sherry

1 tbsp salty soy sauce

3-4 tbsp oyster sauce

1 tbsp sweet soy sauce (Indonesian kecap manis)

1 heaping tsp cornflour

a pinch ground white pepper

a dash of sesame seed oil

3 garlic cloves, minced

1/2 cup water

2 handfuls of medium prawns

2 handfuls of broccoli florets

oil for cooking

Mix the rice wine, salty soy sauce, oyster sauce, sweet soy sauce, white pepper and sesame seed oil in a cup. Dilute the cornflour in a few tablespoons of water and add to the sauce mix, mix well. Add the rest of the water and mix well. 

Heat some oil in a wok on a high heat until very hot and smoking. Toss in the garlic and stir fry for a few seconds. Add the prawns and toss around in the wok until the skin becomes pinkish. 

Add the broccoli, toss around for 20 seconds or so, then add a splash of water to create some steam. Cover and cook for a minute or two, just to get the broccoli crisp-tender (cooked through but still retaining a bite). 

Uncover, add the sauce and mix well. Lower the heat a bit if it starts splattering. Cook until the sauce thickens. Add more water if you like the dish to be more saucy. 

Have a taste and add more seasoning according to your liking.

Dish out and serve. 

Chocolate Cupcakes for Special People

Yes...I just whipped up over a dozen cupcakes. No...It's not just for the sake of gluttony.

The fact is, I have heroes in my life (o boy, that sounds like the beginning of a cheesy Chicken Soup for the Soul story), heroes who deserve cupcakes. Not just any cupcakes, but chocolate cupcakes with very chocolate-y chocolate frosting. 

Let me tell you about these heroes of mine.

Of course, in our lives, there are the mothers, the fathers, the best friends -- those that we can't imagine living without. They are our own personal heroes in their own right. But the ones I'm talking about are a bit different. They are my allies, my camaraderie. Individuals who were once total strangers to me, but who now support my cause, share my dreams, work together with me toward these dreams, and provide me with mental support, much more than they know, every single day.

When I started my foundation, Future Minds, I was scared shitless that nobody would want to join me. Who knows, maybe nobody would care enough to join. I was also unsure about how good a leader I would make. I was head of the academic department in my high school's Student Body, and I was frickin' pathetic. I was self-conscious and nervous and would sweat and sweat and sweat before every meeting that I had to lead. Half of the time, I could see my members looking at me sympathetically, probably thinking, "The poor girl. She's wetting her pants."

I was even more scared once I started reading leadership books, in the hope of mending my sweaty leadership ways. The books said that a leader has to be charismatic, must have "presence", and I was sure I had none. Anywho, with dogged determination and a healthy dose of naivety, I marched onwards and told people about my idea for a foundation anyway. There must be a reward system for naive persistence in the world, because I'm sure at one point God said to His helpers, "Oy, she's tried enough. Let's send her some highly qualified, easy-to-lead people so that she can have a go at her dream."

And that's what happened to me.

True, there are many others who have given their priceless help with my foundation, and I couldn't have done much without them. But the heroes I'm talking about today are the people who work on my foundation constantly. They're the ones who are carrying out our activities and dealing with our problems every day -- the petty stuff and the big issues. They don't know how much I appreciate them -- in those days when the weather is bleak, or when something goes wrong at uni, or when there's just too much to do and I'm at the brink of frustration, or when someone just stings me with criticism, or when it's just a shitty day overall, a simple message from them or a short chat never fails to brighten me up. The whole world can go mad and yet when I hear good news about my foundation from them, all is well.

An old friend once remarked that I'm a housewife inside, and unfortunately that's very true. Cooking for others is how I show my love and appreciation for someone (well, that and giving a big bear hug, but I probably shouldn't do that to the boys, I don't wanna scare them). I'm afraid I wasn't born to be cool. I wish I could just hug each and every one of my heroes and cook up a storm for them and feed them for days on end. I often dream about the meal that I would cook for them once I have the chance. But for now, these cupcakes will have to do.

The greatest thing about them is that they're not just pleasant to work with -- they also make really great friends. That's a rare combination in an organisation and I consider myself extremely lucky! I always quietly regret that I didn't have the chance to get to know these people better before moving away to the Netherlands. I often feel bad when I email them just to ask them to do something for Future Minds. I would really love to just chat with them sometimes, over something trivial, just getting to know them. I do know some things about them, though, and it is these things that make them great comrades.

Alfa is the best company you can have if you want to go to the kitchen, have a coffee break and munch on cake while standing over the kitchen counter. She doesn't judge you if you eat too much and makes you laugh with her funny-but-endearing kitchen routines, like adding excessive salt to anything and everything. I have many kitchen memories with her.

Tasya has that rare combination of being so accomplished and admirable, and yet unthreatening. I think that's because she's really down-to-earth and doesn't hold back from telling you about her personal struggles. She makes you feel very special when she shares her thoughts and worries with you.

Ucup is one of the most genuine people I know. He's very authentic in the sense that he stays true to the kind of person he is, and he's cool with it. I feel comfortable talking to him because he's very open and doesn't hold back -- people who hold back just make me confused.

Arin is my definition of a cool woman. She makes funny jokes, comes up with smart one-liners and just has an aura of ease about her. She's the kind of person you want to invite to your party because she'll just liven it up!

Chita is super fun -- there are many moments when I wish that she would be here with me and my friends. She apologizes a lot because she's afraid of making mistakes, but she really doesn't need to, because she's awesome and does a great job at what she does anyway. You can have a great conversation with her.

Ghufron wows me because he dreams big, really big. When I first got to know him, I had a feeling that he wouldn't let you in on himself too quickly. I was delighted to find out later that we share many common interests, and I can't wait to work together with him on his projects.

Kris is just a really nice guy. It touches me how much he puts into his work at Future Minds Foundation -- he exceeded my expectations, and then some more.

Titut is that wise friend you'd like to go to when you have guy issues or just random life questions in general. She will calm you down with her sensible and gentle approach -- her advice is always well thought out, never brash or juvenile.

Adit is a really charming person and he doesn't even know it. He makes you feel really comfortable around him because he's just a great friend. Sometimes he makes me feel bad because I feel so evil compared to him, but, being a great friend, he wouldn't agree with that.

Reni makes me laugh with her unexpected, random comments. She also has real patience with children, which is not something you can say about a lot of people. 

Farid came across as really quiet at first, but then I found out how brilliant and knowledgeable and passionate he is about his field. I'd love to have a long conversation with him one day about spirituality and religion, just learning from his wealth of knowledge.

Tika has that motherly feel about her, and although I'm not sure if she'd like to hear that, it's actually a really great quality. The housewife in me found a company in the housewife in her -- I have a memory of us getting excited over grocery shopping in Maastricht and making corn and eggplant fritters. She's just really sweet!

Icha and I had a great conversation the other day about Future Minds. I didn't know that she'd told many people about Future Minds, and how passionate she is about it. She reminds me that sometimes there are probably many people who support me more than I know, and I'm not even aware of it. She totally made my day.

Ganes is the kind of person that cracks you up a lot with her unintentional jokes. She made me feel really special when she invited me to her birthday party, just after knowing her briefly. But I think that's how she is -- she just includes people and makes you feel like part of the gang.

Ika and I haven't had much time to get to know each other, but I'd really like to know her better. She seems like a genuine and nice person, the kind you want to be close friends with. I hope I get to have many cosy conversations with her when I see her again.

So, you see, these are the reasons why they deserve cupcakes. That's why at midnight yesterday, instead of going to bed, I whipped up a batch of these cupcakes.

Heroes and cupcakes...They go together in my book. Here's one to each one of you, guys. Couldn't have done it without you.

With love,

Annisa

ps. And for those of you who wonder what the hell I'm gonna do with all these cupcakes...I'm gonna knock on my landlord's door and surprise him with these cupcakes. And give some to the lady who sells newspaper in front of the supermarket. And my hairdresser. And save most for exam nutrition for my housemates (err...did I say nutrition?). And pop one into my mouth, and wash it down with a glass of cold milk.

Chocolate Cupcakes

Recipe adapted from http://www.tartelette.blogspot.com

2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 sticks (8 oz) unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 cup granulated sugar
4 large eggs, at room temperature
6 ounces chocolate, a mix of milk and dark, melted and cooled
1 cup milk

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Sift together the flour, baking soda, and salt and set aside.

In a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, mix the butter and sugar on medium speed until airy and creamy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition (scrape down the sides if necessary). Still on medium speed, add the chocolate and mixing until well incorporated. Add the flour, baking soda and salt alternating with the milk. Make sure that all the ingredients are well incorporated but do not overbeat. With each addition, beat until the ingredients are incorporated, but do not overbeat. 

Spoon the batter into cupcake liners, filling them about 2/3 of the way full. Bake for 20–25 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the cupcake comes out clean.

Whipped Ganache Frosting

12 ounces (360 gr) good quality chocolate, a mix of milk and dark
2 cups (500ml) heavy cream

Place the chocolate in a medium size bowl and set aside. In a large saucepan set over medium heat, bring the cream to a simmer. Pour the hot cream over the chocolate and let sit for a couple of minutes. Stir the cream and chocolate together gently until the mass becomes smooth and shiny. Let cool and refrigerate until very cold. When ready to use, whip the ganache until it is holds its shape and spreads easily. Use as soon as it is made or it will be too stiff to spread. If this happens, just reheat it on top of a double boiler to melt it again, and repeat the cooling and whipping process. If your chocolate is less than 72% bittersweet, add 2 more ounces before adding the hot cream.

Spread on the baked and cooled cupcakes. Smooth out with a bread knife.

Name Plates

1 bar of white chocolate, chopped up

1/4 bar of milk chocolate, chopped up

wax or baking paper 

a round-shaped cookie cutter

a toothpick

Boil a pot of water. Place a heatproof bowl over the pot, with the bottom of the bowl not touching the water. Place the chopped up white chocolate bar on the bowl until melted. Be careful not to get ANY water in the melted chocolate!

Place the wax or baking paper on a flat surface. Pour the melted chocolate on the wax or baking paper, spread out and smooth out with a bread knife. The result should be no less than 1/4 cm thick. Cool until almost hard. Cut into rounds with the cookie cutter. Cool again until the name plates are harder. Carefully lift each name plate off the paper and place on a plate.

With the same method as before, melt the milk chocolate (using a new, clean bowl). Wait for the melted chocolate to cool a bit. If it's too hot, when you use it to write on the name plate, it will melt the name plate.

Once slightly cooled, dip a toothpick in the melted chocolate and use it to write on the name plates. Be careful with the finished name plates -- do not touch them and let them dry on their own.

Place on baked and frosted cupcakes.